Lunchtime Limits

Jayson tries to pack cold lunches for the girls every day. The hot lunches at our school are great, but just a little bit less healthy than how we eat at home. Jayson packed Lydia a tuna salad wrap on Wednesday. She decided at school that she did not like it, so she bought hot lunch. We explained to her that she can't do that because it's a waste of money and she would take that same tuna salad wrap the next day (which she loved, by the way). That night, after Jayson was gone, I told Lydia that I was going to "freeze her lunch account" and she would not be allowed to buy anything except for milk, so she shouldn't even try to.

On Friday, we were in desperate need of groceries, so Jayson decided to let the girls have hot lunch. He called me at school.

Jayson: Hi. Lydia is going to have hot lunch today, so she insisted I call you to have you unfreeze her account.
Me: Oh. Yeah. That was big fat lie.
Jayson: Yes, I understand that. But, that doesn't change the fact that I have to call you and have you unfreeze her account.
Me: Oooooooh! Yeah! Beep Beep Boop Beep. I just pushed the unfreeze button!
Jayson: Thank you.
Me: You're welcome.

More From the Girl with the Camera

Lydia has been quite the shutterbug lately. Here are some more examples of her work.

I will spare you the following:

• Several pictures of her name on various pieces of paper from school.
• Several pictures of her room.
• 115 blurry pictures from the Prom grand march at my school. Most with people in them. In some, you can even tell who the people are. Also, a 27-second video. She did get some actual clear shots of the king and queen being crowned.
• Several pictures of TV shows on the TV. I'll include this one though, because I like Audrey's cameo.

Here are some she took with Charlie:

This video had me laughing until I cried. I have no words.

There's another one very similar to it that I can't post because Jayson is shirtless in the background and he would be pissed, but imagine almost the same video with him walking through in the background with no indication that he is aware of the weirdness our daughter is displaying other than one single confused glance in her direction and then he continues to go about his business. I'm pretty sure that will be his disposition 99% of the time when they're teenagers.

This instructional video of her letting the dog out. I know my phone number is at the end, so don't try anything fancy.

Lydia: Future Internet Phenomenon

Lydia asked Grandma Deb for a digital camera for her birthday, and Grandma Deb did not disappoint. Lydia is obsessed with the camera and is plowing through batteries like crazy. I got a chance to take a look at her pictures and found that she's pretty much got the digital picture thing down. She asked me to put them on the internet. So, here are the classic pictures that every internet poster needs. Here we go:

1) Picture of a picture.

2) Picture of food:

3) Picture of friend making a "duck face":

4) Creeping on the neighbors:

5) Your parents looking stupid:

6) Selfie.

She's ready for Facebook!

New Heights

We joined our gym a little over five years ago, when Lydia was almost two. One thing we really like is the pool. It has a zero-depth entry and equipment for the kids to play on. It also has a water slide. You have to be 48" tall to go down the water slide. Lydia has been looking forward to the day when she would be tall enough for quite a while. Every time we went swimming, she would check her height, and when we shook our head, she would be disappointed.

Then Sunday night it happened. She went to measure her height and stood as tall as she could, and she was tall enough! Well, almost. I think she was a little short, but it was close enough. Then she wimped out and decided she didn't want to go down the slide. Finally, Jayson went down first and then she followed and she loved it. She spent the whole rest of our time there going down the slide and telling us how awesome it was. It was so fun to see how much she loved it. Now she keeps asking when we can go back.

Public Embarrassment

In about ten years, I'll be able to repay them. But, for now, when I go out in public with the girls, it ends up being me who gets embarrassed. Usually, it's while we're shopping, but really, any public forum will do.

This past weekend, I had to run into to Target really quickly before church, and Jayson wanted to get us some coffee from Starbucks. So, we decided to divide and conquer. He took Charlie, I took Lydia and Audrey. Since time was an issue, I put Lydia in the back of the cart and Audrey in the front, and we took off. One stop was in the feminine products aisle, where I grabbed a box of purple tampons. Shortly thereafter, while booking it down the main aisle of Target, Lydia held them high above her head and asked me what they were. I told her to put them down and I would tell her later. "Highlighters, Mommy? They're highlighters?" Yes, dear. Highlighters.

Target is a frequent hot spot of mine. I enjoy visits at least weekly. One time I walked through the lingerie section and Lydia, who was two at the time, excited pointed to the racks of bras and yelled, "Mommy's boobies! Mommy's boobies!"

As she got older, she become more inquisitive of other people. We once passed a lesbian couple, both of whom were short and sported very masculine looks, including basketball shorts and baseball caps. Lydia very loudly asked me where those boys' mother was and why there were alone in the store.

Lydia also went through a stage of being obsessed with hair length and would see men with long hair and women with short hair and question their choices (I admit -- I questioned their choices too, just not out loud). "Mommy, is that a boy or a girl? A boy? Why is his hair long like a girl's?"

One time around Christmas, I was shopping with Lydia, and she was just over 1.5 years old. We were at Old Navy and she saw some teddy bears and excitedly pointed to them, yelling, "Lydia bear?" I told her no, and we kept shopping. I pushed the stroller in front of me while I bent down to look at a low-hanging rack of clothes. As I was looking, I could hear Lydia quietly talking. I stood up to see another woman, on the other side of the stroller, also bending down to look at the low-hanging rack of clothes. She had one of the bears in her arms along with other stuff she was going to buy. Lydia had spotted the bear and was quietly whispering to the woman, "Lydia bear. Lydia bear. Lydia bear," trying to get the woman to hand it over. The woman was silently holding in laughter, trying to ignore Lydia.

One time at the grocery store, Lydia was 4 and did not want to be shopping. She yelled, for the whole store to hear, "I'm hungry! You don't feed me!" When that didn't get the attention she wanted, she yelled, "Please don't leave me in the car alone!" (Something I have never done.)

Then there was the time last fall, when Lydia and I were grocery shopping and had what I thought was a very cute conversation.

Lydia: Mommy, do you want me to tell you all the bad words?

Me: Oh yeah, tell them to me. L: STUPID Me: Ooooh, that's a bad one!  L: HATE Me: Yup, another bad word, you're right! L: SHIT Me: Oh. Yeah. Let's not say that one again, OK?

I don't think she said that one loud enough for too many people to hear. 

There's no crying in baseball! Well, except when it's over.

This summer Lydia played baseball and Audrey played tee-ball. We mainly chose to sign up because it was only $25 and figured that if they didn't like it, at least it was only $25. We have tried other activities in the past. Soccer was a bust. Lydia was three and was not interested at all. In fact, she hid behind trees and we had to tell her to stop eating grass more than once. Dance wasn't a good fit either. I wasn't a big fan from the beginning, but it was one of the few things she could sign up for at four and there was no grass. She just wasn't very interested in it and the recitals were a racket. We did ice-skating too, which actually went pretty well. It was expensive though, and as soon as she lost interest, we stopped the lessons and told her she could try again when she was ready to focus more. She wants to try again this winter. Audrey has absolutely no interest in skating after some not-so-great lessons. They both love swimming, which we will continue to do with them because I think it's a great sport for them and they love it and are good at it.

Lydia's baseball team practiced Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday mornings. She only missed two practices. There were some kids who barely practiced at all and then showed up for games, which confused me. She LOVED her coaches. They were both college students, one male and one female, and they were amazing with the kids. The male coach really seemed to bond with Lydia and always had a special job for her. Plus, she learned how to play baseball! She actually improved a lot. She really liked hitting and when it was her turn to field, she liked being pitcher or catcher. I was pretty impressed by the end of the season when she actually seemed to know how to play baseball!

Audrey's team only met on Wednesdays. The first few were practices and the last several were games. It was pretty adorable. They don't really learn how to field yet, but get the basics of the game. There's nothing cuter than an entire team of four year-olds chasing after a ball. She was also one of the smallest kids on her team, having just turned four a week before practice.

When their final game came around, both girls were upset. Audrey asked if we could sign up for it again, and I tried to explain to her that we would, but it would be in ten months. Lydia actually sobbed when her last game was over, which broke my heart, but also made me so, so glad that she had such a great time.

Here are some pictures from their last games.

Little Sluggers

Lydia and Audrey are playing baseball and tee ball this summer. It's through the West Allis rec department. Lydia has practices Monday through Wednesday and games on Thursday. Audrey has practice/games every Wednesday.

Audrey is the smallest on her team, having turned four just a week before the league started. She loves it and seems especially fond of running the bases. I didn't get to go to her first practice because it was also Lydia's last day of swimming. I was very excited to go to her practice yesterday. So was she. She kept running up to me all day to tell me tidbits of information, including, "Mommy, they guy (I'm assuming it was her coach, and not some random guy watching a bunch of little kids play ball) said I can't blink when I hit the ball. I can't blink. I have to keep my eyes open." I asked her to show me how she does that and her eyes got very  big as she pretended to swing a bat. On an adult, it would look like a zombie hacking at an innocent human, but on her the look was endearing. She also told me, "Mommy, after practice, we get juice and snacks. But only the people practicing. If you don't practice, you don't get the juice and snacks." Got it. Practicing is clutch if you want the juice and snacks. She also has throwing technique down pretty well, but only in slow motion. You can almost see the gears working in her brain as she slowly puts her left foot forward, brings her right arm back, rotates her arm forward, and releases the ball.

Lydia has an additional obstacle in the fact that she doesn't get a tee. It's coach pitch baseball. In a game, if they get three strikes, then they get a shot at it with the tee. This happened every time she was at bat for her first game tonight. What was great, though, is that she wasn't even that great at hitting it off the tee, so it would dribble off and land a couple feet in front of her and she could easily get a base hit. This resulted in her actually scoring a run, which she was very excited about. I'm glad she can even hit it off the tee because she has my uncoordinated genes in her. There's a reason I run. Anything else is too complex. I bike too, but Jayson makes fun of me every spring when I have to admit that I forgot how to shift during the winter.

What was really great about Lydia's game was how involved she was in it. For every batter, there was a cheer of "Here we go, (insert name here), Here we go!" Every single batter. Every single pitch. And it only got a little bit old after the first inning. She also did a great job watching the game, even when it was her turn to sit on the bench when they were fielding. She just sat there and watched. When she was fielding, we were worried she would be a little space cadet in the outfield, but she actually ran towards balls! I was very impressed.

The Mystery Ailment

Sunday night Audrey woke up complaining that her arm hurt. Monday night she woke up complaining that her arm hurt, and then a little while later, her hand. I discovered a bunch of red bumps on her palm that looked like tiny blister under the skin. We went to the doctor on Tuesday and he was not very concerned about the arm pain and told us the bumps were a virus similar to hand, foot, and mouth disease. He told us we could give her ibuprofen for the pain and as long as she didn't develop a fever, she would not be contagious after a couple days. He said it would spread and probably last a week or two. Tuesday night, whe woke up with arm pain again. Wednesday morning, we saw that the bumps had indeed spread to her arms. Wednesday afternoon after her nap, the bumps had spread up her arm and were no longer blisters under the skin, but raised blisters with liquid in them. She also complained more of arm pain and would not use her right arm. I took her in to the doctor again, but our regular doctor was out, so she saw a different one. This doctor was stumped and concentrated more on the arm pain, but found nothing wrong. She could move it OK and no matter how the doctor twisted it, Audrey didn't seem uncomfortable. She brought in another doctor to look at the bumps and they concluded that it's a virus like chicken pox. They said she would only really be contagious of people came in direct contact with the bumps, so she needs to wear long sleeves. In June. None of the three doctors seemed to be very sure of their diagnoses, and we go back on Friday for a follow-up, right before we're supposed to head for Minnesota for the weekend. It's frustrating to see her in pain and not know what's causing it. She is such a trooper, though. I'm very curious to see how this ends.

In other news, two funny things from Lydia:

I told her that this morning I found Charlie licking my deodorant. Lydia said that was gross and I agreed. Then she said, "Now you have to put it back in your armpit! Disgusting!" Apparently, she is more worried about my delicate armpits.

Tonight Lydia told me, "I think you were cuckoo when you were a little girl." I confessed to her that I think I'm still a little cuckoo. She looked at me very concerned and said, "Should I tell somebody?"

Baseballs to the face and dunking babies. No really, it was fun.

Today was Lydia's second baseball practice. She got hit in the face with a ball and didn't cry, and that moment has gone on Jayson's list of Top Ten Proud Daddy Moments.

Audrey had swim lessons so I swam with Lydia and Charlie. Charlie's new favorite thing to do is go under water while I put my hands on her waist and glide her around. She asked me to do it over and over again. Just to make sure the other moms and lifeguard didn't think I was abusing my child by constantly dunking her, I made her say, "One, two, three, GO!" and then she would push her face in the water before I would glide her. She loved it. I loved watching her underwater with her big round eyes and huge toothy smile.

WTH?

Today, shortly after most of my family had arrived for Audrey's birthday party, Lydia was playing hide-and-seek with her cousin. He hid pretty well and she was looking all over the house for him. She walked through the kitchen and into the living room, within earshot of everybody, saying, "Where did he go? Where is he? Where the HELL did he go?" All of our eyes got big and we held back laughs that came exploding out. She was mortified and I could tell right away. She ran up to our bedroom and I followed to find her laying on the floor crying, with her head under our bed. I talked to her for a while and explained to her why people laughed. I think the embarrassment was enough to ensure that she won't be saying it again.

Our Almost ER Visit

No, not recently. But, a friend of mine recently had to take her daughter to the ER, which brought up memories of the one and only time we almost went to the ER. Lydia was 3, Audrey was 1, and Charlie was not in the picture yet. It was a Tuesday night. Jayson was playing softball and Audrey was sleeping. Lydia was not feeling well. She had a fever, so she was in her jammies earlier than she normally would be. Then she complained that her neck hurt. My immediate thought was, "Oh my God, she has meningitis."

I called the doctor on call for our pediatrician's office. I went over her symptoms with him and he was also concerned about the neck pain. He told me to ask Lydia to put her chin to her chest.

Let me interject here to say that Lydia is and always has been a drama queen. A very good one, too. She can pick up on emotions in a room and respond in a way that will ensure as much attention is placed on her as possible. She can cry at the drop of a hat. She can lay a guilt trip on you and you won't even realize what hit you until she's laying in your spot on the couch with a handful of cookies and your blanket and you have promised her that tomorrow you will make special pancakes for breakfast and ride the train at the zoo.

So, when I asked Lydia to put her chin to her chest, she winced with pain and cried that it just hurt too much and she couldn't do it. I informed the doctor and he said that if it's too painful for her, I needed to get her to Children's Hospital ER. So, I frantically called Jayson and told him to come home immediately. As I ran around the house grabbing my shoes and purse, I continued to ask Lydia if she could please just put her chin to her chest, and she would try, but then cry in pain.

I got Lydia in the car, and as soon as Jayson got home, we left. As we drove, she seemed to cheer up. I popped in her favorite Raffi CD, and we sang along. I pointed out that she seemed to be feeling better, which threw her immediately into another fit of pain. I told her that if we went to the hospital, she might have to get a big shot. Didn't seem to upset her. I asked her again to touch her chin to her chest and she refused because the pain was just too much.

We pulled into the ER parking lot and got to the doors. I knew that if we went through those doors, we would be in for a long night. I was having doubts about the severity of her symptoms. I knelt down in front of her, and pointed to a monkey on her pajamas right on her belly. I smiled, "Look at this silly monkey! What's he doing?" She looked, down, chin to chest, and smiled at the silly monkey. I stood up, grabbed her hand, and sighed, "Back in the car, Lydia. We're going home."

Napping House

Lydia stopped napping shortly after she turned two. We were not too excited about it until we realized that she would go to be earlier, and even then, we weren't too excited. Audrey stopped napping daily just a few months ago. She still takes maybe one or two good naps per week. Charlie is still napping, but she's not even two yet.

Every so often, Lydia turns into a devil. She is horrible. Her ears stop working, her eyes get red, and she is completely and totally exhausted. When then happens, we try to get her to take a nap. It took us a long time to figure out how to get it to work, but now my method is foolproof.

She lays in my bed with me. I close the blinds. She must cuddle up to me. There can be no distractions. No toys, no TV. We lay in silence. If she speaks, I shush her. I tell her to close her yes. Within ten minutes, she's snoring. Often, the added bonus is that I can take a quick nap too. However, usually after sleeping for ten minutes, I can't stop thinking about all the other things I should be doing now that all three of them are sleeping.

Here's the tricky part. Remember how she has to cuddle up to me? That makes my escape pretty difficult. I slowly ease one limb at a time away from her, each time pausing at least a minute be extra sure she is still asleep. Once I get out of bed, I take a second to look at how cute an peaceful she is. Except, she sleeps with her eyes slightly open (you can actual see her pupils and the blue of her irises), and her mouth wide open. So, while she looks cute and peaceful, she also looks really creepy.

The best is when she wakes up and comes downstairs, full of smiles and the sweetest little girl ever. The good behavior usually lasts at least a couple days.

When Mama Bear Attacks

OK, so I shouldn't really say "attack," more like "just deals with the situation," but attack was catchier. A couple Fridays ago, Lydia got off the bus and as soon as she saw me, she burst into tears. She told me the boy who lives across the street was teasing and bullying her on the bus. He and another boy would sing, "Lydia has a boyfriend! Lydia has a boyfriend!" and taunt her. She said she plugged her ears really hard but she could still hear it. I asked her if she sits next to him, and she told me she does. I asked her if she has told anybody and she said she hadn't.

As a teacher, I get annoyed when parents fight their kids' battles, especially at the high school level. I know Lydia is only five, but I didn't want to step in quite yet. So, I told her that on Monday I don't want her sitting next to him on the bus and I wanted her to tell the bus driver and her teacher what was going on. On Monday she got off the bus and was upset again. She said he still teased her, even though she didn't sit by him and she told the bus driver and her teacher. I convinced her to give it one more day and explained that maybe they didn't have a chance to talk to him yet.

I did get advice from others on what to do. Teaching her to kick him in the balls was not an option for me. I'm a pretty hardcore pacifist. One of my students suggested that I teach her to respond to his "Lydia has a boyfriend" taunts with "Yeah, your dad!" (ala a "your mom" joke), which I found funny, but didn't really think it would be effective. I did, however, instruct her to tell him that if he doesn't stop, her mom is going to talk to his mom and her mom is the meanest mom around. "Buy you're not, you're nice! She argued," and I assured her that I could be very, very mean.

Then Tuesday came and she once again got off the bus upset. So, we dropped off her backpack, Jayson gave me a look like, "You're really doing this? This is really happnening?" and Lydia and I marched across the street. Lydia skipped happily and I internalized all my nervousness about just how terribly wrong this could go. We rang the doorbell and waited. When the boy's mom came to the door, I tried to slowly blurt out, "Hi, I live across the street and Lydia rides the bus with your son and she said he's been teasing her on the bus and she's been coming home crying and very upset. I didn't want to make a big deal out of it, but thought it might be something we could resolve." She immediately called her son to the door and as soon as he saw Lydia and me and realized that the meanest mom around was talking to his mom, his lip quivered and he held back tears. His mom told him what he was doing was completely unacceptable and made him apologize. Lydia responded, "That's OK." I thanked her for understanding and Lydia and I happily walked back home.

She hasn't had any more problems with the boy across the street.

Your Mom Goes to College

Last night as I was putting Lydia to bed, she started crying. "I don't want to move out when I'm 18." It seems she wants to live in our house forever. I assured her she doesn't ever have to move out and she can live with us forever.

Then she asked me what will happen when she goes to college. I told her there are plenty of colleges around here and she can go to one of them and still live with us! She seemed relieved by this.

Then she asked what will happen if she wants to go to a different college that's far away. "Can you come with me?" YES! I assured her that I would go with her to college.
"You can do that?"
"Yeah, why not?"
"You already went to college."
"Yes, but I can go again!"
"They'll let you do that?"
"YES!"
"Yay! So you can come to college with me and give me kisses?"
"Yes, I'll go to college with you and give you kisses!"

Then she was concerned about how she will get to college.
"Do buses go to college?"
"No, but you'll be old enough to drive."
"Can you just drive me?"
"Yes, I will drive you to college and give you kisses."

I will remind her of this in 12 years.

Night

On most weekdays, I've been out of the house for about an hour and a half by the time my kids wake up. I absolutely hate that I miss wake-up time. It's one of my favorite times of the day because the girls are at their absolute cutest. They crawl into our bed, their hair a mess and their eyes still puffy (I know, because I DO get to see this on the weekends). Their internal sleep meters are completely charged and they are at their sweetest, giving hugs and kisses to us and even each other. Sometimes, before coming upstairs, we can hear Lydia and Audrey talking on the monitor and then hear the thump of their feet as they run out of their room, down the hall, through the kitchen, through the living room, up the stairs, and into our room. A short time later, we hear Charlie yelling, "Daadaa! Mommy!" and go get her to discover her standing in her crib, holding all of her stuffed animals and blankets and asking us to put her socks on.

On the other hand, I will admit to sometimes being relieved when I miss bedtime. Not every time I have to miss it, but sometimes. When the week has been long and trying, and when Jayson has texted me that he needs a beer. Or three. Those are the days that I feel a bit of relief when I'm not there, but also a bit of guilt and a bit of sadness. Bedtime has been overall a fairly easy time for us. Well, except for when Lydia was about one and a half until two. During that time, we moved her to a "big girl bed" and she would NOT stay in it. Jayson and I made the new parent mistake of laying in bed with her. Then we were trapped. It took us months to finally be able to get her to sleep without us in the room. Then more months to get her to sleep without us in the hallway, sitting where she could see us, working on our computers or reading a magazine.

We did not make that mistake with the others. In fact, Audrey STILL won't get out of bed on her own most mornings. She yells for us to go in her room and get her, despite the fact that she is in a regular bed and could easily get out on her own. Bedtime now is pretty easy and brief. Jammies, teeth, book, hugs and kisses, draw a nightlight for them on their Crayola Glow Station, and then bed. There are definitely nights where they stay up giggling or yelling or crying, but those are getting more and more sparse.

It's not so much bedtime being stressful as it is that time between dinner and bed. One of my friends calls it "The Witching Hour," when it's too early for bed, but the kids are tired and cranky and their internal sleep meter is urgently flashing red. Sleep is required and it will come soon, but not yet. That is probably my least favorite time of day. When bedtime finally comes, and for us it is early because our kids don't nap (even Charlie is outgrowing her naps) and they get up early, it is a relief. The bedtime routine starts and ends and Jayson and I collapse on the couch.

Then the house quiets down. And then I start to miss them and wish they were awake and want to peek at them sleeping but don't want to risk waking up the cherubs that just an hour ago were devils. It is this part of the day when I want to just hold them and stroke their hair and put their cheek to mine and whisper songs in their ears and just love them. When they were babies, a cry in the night brought a grumble and ruined a good night's sleep. Now, on many nights, it's a special treat. One more kiss and hug in the night and they're back to sleep. Or with Charlie, who is by far the best snuggler, ten minutes of rocking under a blankie with her head tucked into my neck. Those are times I cherish.

Little Sports Fans

Audrey likes to say she's a football fan. She claims she likes the Packers. She can name a few of the players. But, when it comes down to it, once the game has been on for two minutes, she's done. She's hungry. She wants to watch Dora. Lydia has never shown any interest in football. She will happily sit on the couch and color in her journal while we watch, and she likes to know names of the people on the team, but she couldn't care less about the game. Charlie is happy just running around and doing whatever her sisters do.

Until this past Sunday. The Packer game was good. It was close. It was the kind of game that makes you jump off the couch and yell at the TV. Audrey said she wanted to watch it and intently asked us who everybody was and told us to let her know when Aaron Rodgers was on. Lydia sat on my lap and watched and when things got tense, she actually paid attention. When I yelled, "First down!" she yelled, "Touchdown!" (Hey, at least it was close.) At one point, when a Packers receiver dropped a pass, she even groaned. SHE GROANED! She had an inkling of what was going on. We taught Charlie to throw her arms in the air and yell, "TOUCHDOWN!" All three of them were into the game!

When it was all over, Lydia said to Jayson, "Daddy, can we watch football every Sunday?" I think it was one of his proudest fathering moments.

Sunday Sillies

I love my job, but I cherish the time I get to spend at home with my family. Sunday afternoons are one of my favorite times of the week. This Sunday after lunch Jayson watched football, Charlie napped, and Lydia and Audrey laid in my bed with me and watched Finding Nemo. The intent was to get Lydia to take a much-needed nap, and it worked. And I got to sneak one in to. Until I woke up to Audrey in Lydia's face whispering her name and trying to wake her up. Luckily, I woke up first and shooed her away.

Often, Jayson and I will just sit back and watch all three of them run around like crazy. Today, Lydia and Audrey were playing some game where they ran from the living room to the play room and back to the living room over and over again, giggling and squealing. Charlie followed them with one dress-up shoe on, clomping down the hall once as they made their rounds at least three times to her one.

We also love to hear them talk to each other and to us. I could go on and on about the funny things they said this weekend. Audrey is obsessed with brussel sprouts and begs for them with every meal. She likes to pick out the smallest one she can find and say in a high-pitched voice, "Look at this cute little baby one!" Charlie says "NO!" to everything and has started repeating many, many words and phrases. Lydia is hilarious. She has been giving her phone number out to boys at school. Today a bunch of people walked past our house and we talked about where they might be going and Audrey suggested they were going to the fair, to which Lydia replied, "The fair? Fair's over, kid." Lydia also asked me yesterday if I wanted to hear all the bad words and I said I would, so she said, "STUPID!," and I replied, "Oh yeah, that's one is really bad!" Then she said, "HATE!," and I said, "Yes, you're right, another bad one!" Then she said, "SHIT!" and I suggested it might be best not to repeat that one.

Horrible Mom Award

The other night Lydia and Audrey were running around being goofy. I was sitting on the loveseat in the living room, which backs right up to a shared wall with the kitchen. The girls walked around the corner from the kitchen into the living room and I peeked around the corner and said, "Boo!," giving them a little scare and they laughed a lot. Then they kept asking me to scare them again, and I kept telling them that if they knew I was going to do it, it wouldn't be a surprise, and they wouldn't be scared.

Later that evening, Lydia was in her room on Audrey's bed. They have bunk beds that are T-shaped and Audrey's bed (which is on the bottom) is flanked on each side by a dresser/bookshelf and a desk. So, she it's a cozy little nook. Lydia was looking for a book on the shelf. I took this opportunity to sneak into the room without her seeing me and hide by the dresser. She was yelling for me to come help her find the book she was looking for. I peeked around the corner and yelled, "Boo!"

Certain things hit the fan. She looked at me with a look of shock and terror, screamed, and started crying uncontrollably. I immediately picked her up and hugged her and apologized about 1,382,976 times and tried to calm her down. She sobbed as she begged me never to do that again.

The next day, I asked her, "Hey Lyd, remember when I scared you last night? It was pretty good, right?" That was a definite no.

Our First Scar

We have never taken any of our kids to the ER or urgent care. I know we've been lucky. We came close this summer when Charlie fell off the couch. Lydia and Charlie have both fallen down the stairs. Lydia made it to the doors of the ER when she was about two. I was convinced she had meningitis. She had a fever and hadn't been feeling well, then complained that her neck was sore. I immediately called our doctor's after hours number and the doctor on call told me that if she couldn't put her chin to her chest, I should bring her to the ER. I asked her to put her chin to her chest and she couldn't and complained it hurt too much. Now, you have to understand that Lydia has always been an actress. I wasn't entirely convinced, but after several more attempts to get her to put her chin to her chest without luck, I called Jayson, who was at softball, and told him to get home and watch Audrey while I took Lydia to the ER.

We got in the car and she seemed to cheer up quite a bit. I kept asking her to put her chin to her chest, but then she would start to get more morose and wouldn't do it. We finally got to the ER, and knowing that if we went in there it would be possible she would need a spinal tap, I asked her one more time to put her chin to her chest. Nope. So, we got out of the car and headed to the doors of the ER. Then I had an idea. I pointed to a monkey on the front of her pajama shirt and said, "Look at this silly monkey! What's he doing?" She giggled and looked down at her shirt, putting her chin to her chest. I swooped her up and we headed home.

This weekend, my insurance plan changed. I went from a $300 family deductible to a $4000 family deductible. There is a wellness program that will be put in place to reimburse a large part of the deductible, but it won't start until January 1. Also, our deductible starts over January 1. We were told that our best bet is to just not need a doctor until next year. So, on Saturday evening, the first day of our new insurance, I was going upstairs to put Charlie to bed and Jayson was getting Audrey to bed. Lydia was brushing her teeth. I heard a loud thump and Jayson yelled, "Holly! Get down here now!" I threw Charlie in her crib and ran downstairs to find Lydia screaming and crying and Jayson holding a rag to her chin.

Lydia had somehow fallen off the bathroom stool and hit her chin on the bathtub, busting it open. She later told me she was goofing off and had forgotten to calm down for bedtime. I held her in my arms and held the rag to her chin. When I pulled it away, I saw a 1 cm cut that was spread open pretty wide. I put the rag back on and told Jayson, "I think she needs stitches." I'm pretty certain that had we taken her to the ER or urgent care, she would have gotten a couple stitches or they would have at least used that fancy glue. Jayson pointed out the fact that we would be paying in the neighborhood of $1000 or more if we went. We opted to call his mom and she brought over butterfly bandages.

After she fell as I calmed her down, she was making a gurgling noise and I couldn't figure out why. I thought maybe she was bleeding in her mouth, but looked inside and saw lot of spit and no blood. I told her to swallow, but she refused. I held a towel for her and she spit into it and yelled, "I was using your minty toothpaste and I'm not supposed to swallow it!" While I held Lydia and calmed her down, Audrey gave her kisses on her head and Lydia asked her to stop, so Audrey just stroked her arm, and Lydia said, "Audrey, will you please stop touching me?" Awww... she was very concerned about her big sister.

So far, we can't tell how it's going to heal. The butterfly bandage held it shut, so I'm glad we didn't go to the ER (I also ran a marathon on Sunday and was dreading the thought of Jayson spending the night in the ER with her and me being up all night worrying). I'm sure she'll have a little scar, but I think it will make her look pretty tough and give her a little character. 

Mean Girls... and So it Begins

Last year, for K4, Lydia picked out a Disney princess backpack. I wasn't too excited about it. I tried to steer her towards Toy Story or Dora, but she insisted on princesses, and if that's what she wanted, fine with me. Of course, being a backpack that cost less than $10, it was looking pretty ragged by the end of the year.

This year, we looked online for one, and my aim was to spend a little more money on a decent backpack that would last several years. Maybe even get her name embroidered on it. As we searched online, though, we came across a Phineas and Ferb backpack that came with a matching lunch box. OMG! She was smitten. Had it been another princess backpack, I would have shot her down, but I admit, I loved the fact that she was drawn to a "boy" backpack and not another Disney princess one. Today, Phineas and Ferb. Tomorrow? Social advocate! Awww... my little feminist. We found a Perry the Platypus water bottle to go with it, and completed our order.

When her backpack came, it was a pretty big deal. She immediately ran to get her school supplies to put in it. We opened the box with the water bottle and discovered they accidentally sent us three! Christmas in August! I quickly claimed one as my own to bring to school. (Scroll down to the previous post to see her wearing the backpack).

Then, it happened. Lydia told me girls at school were bullying her because she didn't have a princess backpack. They told her Phineas and Ferb was for boys, and she should have a princess backpack. I asked her who was saying that, and she said all the girls in her class except for her friend who had a monkey backpack. My heart broke. My first instinct was to talk to her teacher. Well, actually, my first instinct was go to her class before school and find those girls and tell them through gritted teeth that the needed to leave my daughter alone and their stupid Disney princess backpacks were ugly. Alas, I refrained.

Instead, I talked to Lydia about bullying and why girls do it. I helped her come up with something she could say back to them, which she has memorized. I talked to her about sticking up for her friend with the monkey backpack too. I hope that the girls forget about the backpacks and she doesn't have to worry about her comeback, but I'm also kind of looking forward to her asserting herself if they don't forget.