Earrings Part Two

It's been two weeks now since Audrey had her ears pierced and she still cries whenever we put the antiseptic on them and try to turn them, but there is no sign of any kind of infection. They look great. We're trying to decide if she's just being a drama queen or if they really hurt, and I'm leaning towards her being an Oscar nominee in twenty-some years. Two things that have helped are allowing her to do the antiseptic herself (it's very amusing watch a two-year-old trying to get a q-tip to her ear - kind of like watching a field sobriety test) and letting her hold Lydia's hand while we twist them.

Jayson insisted my next blog post be about our incident yesterday morning. My mom was here (after watching the girls Saturday night so Jayson and I could have a date), and Audrey came tearing through the kitchen and ran into Charlie's highchair (this type of thing is a common occurrence with Audrey). At some point in the toddler to chair collision, Audrey's earring fell out. As you may recall, after a frantic incident shortly after Audrey got her ears pierced, Jayson got the earring back in unassisted and claimed his title as Father of the Year. So, Jayson said, "You do it. I did it last time." No problem! I sat down with a screaming Audrey on my lap and attempted to put the earring back in. No luck. I was shaking and all upset that she was so upset and I just couldn't do it. So, I held her on my lap while my mom tried and finally got the earring through. She couldn't get the back on due to her long glorious fingernails, so I had to do that part, and was successful. A smug Jayson sat in the kitchen.

So, I commend Jayson. He came through in a situation where I found myself too shaken to do the same. Usually, our roles are reversed. Each time I gave birth, the nurses seemed a little more concerned with him than with me. However, when it comes to earrings, he is king. I often hear women complaining about their husbands and how inept they are with their children. I tell anybody who will listen how lucky I am that he is such a great dad and does such an awesome job staying home with the girls. So, kudos to Jayson.

Little White Lies

Our kids operate well with a system of rewards and loss of privileges. They know that if they do something well, they will be rewarded with things like a special dessert, swimming at the gym, having a friend over, etc. They know that if they don't listen, they can lose privileges like watching TV before bed, picking their chair at dinner, going to dance lessons, etc. One reward they really like is getting to stay up late on weekends. Jayson and I are not a fan of that reward because after a long week, we really like to be able to sit back on the couch with each other, a bottle of wine, and America's Most Wanted.

So, when it gets close to bedtime on a Saturday, Lydia will often ask, "Can we stay up late tonight?" To which, we always reply, "Sure!" Huh? Didn't I just tell you we don't like letting them stay up late? Well, the thing is, the girls can't tell time. Not only can't they tell time, but even if they could, they probably couldn't tell you what their bedtime is. Bedtime for them is about 6:30. This is perfect because I'm home from work by 3:30 and prefer to go to bed by 9:00 so I can get eight hours of sleep. So, I spend three hours with the girls, get them to bed, and then have a couple hours for schoolwork.

So, when it's 6:00 on a Saturday, and Lydia asks if she can stay up late, we'll say, "Well, I guess, but it's already pretty late. We'll let you stay up for another half an hour since you were good today." She thinks she has just performed a major coup, and Jayson and I still get to keep our date with John Walsh. Everybody wins!

Now, the problem is that this only works in the winter, and in just a few short weeks, daylight savings time will end and the sun will set at about 7:00. Lydia may not be able to tell time, but the kid can see. I'm thinking we might need some good window shades.

The Bedtime Routine

Bedtime is my least favorite time of day. I will never understand why kids resist sleep. They are clearly exhausted by bedtime, but unwilling to just close their eyes and rest. Many experts will tell you that the key to a seamless bedtime is to have a routine. My kids are ALL about a bedtime routine. Unfortunately, it's not the same one Jayson and I have in mind.

If Jayson and I had it our way, the routine would be as follows:

1) Get pajamas on

2) Brush teeth

3) Go potty

4) Read books

5) Say prayers

6) Hugs and kisses

7) Sleep

Unfortunately, the routine the girls prefer is:

1) Strip down naked

2) Run around the house yelling, "I see your booty!" and slap said booties

3) Finally get pajamas on

4) Fight over the stool to reach the sink and brush teeth, cry for somebody to help you brush your teeth

5) Insist you do not have to go potty

6) Pick the longest, stupidest book you can find on the bookshelf

7) Squeeze each other's hand so hard during prayers that giggle fits erupt

8) Hugs and kisses and overall mauling of each other 

9) Say goodnight

10) Scream that you need a drink of water

11) Scream that you have to go potty

12) Scream that somehow you dropped your blanket from the top bunk "accidentally" 

13) Scream that you can't close your eyes

14) Scream that you need another hug and kiss

15) Scream just to scream

16) Eventually fall asleep after Mommy and Daddy threaten to remove any privileges you currently have (while the 2 year-old points her finger at you saying, "Don't talk to me like that!")

Luckily, it's all worth it, because our kids sleep 12 hours at night and wake up in such fun, sweet moods. Only for it to start all over again the next night.

Raising My Little Socially Aware Activists

I was able to travel to Madison this weekend for the rallies opposing Governor Scott Walker’s budget repair bill. One of the highlights of the trip was listening to Jesse Jackson speak. Amazing. I never would have thought back in school when I learned about the Civil Rights Movement that I would someday hear that man speak. I truly feel like I have witnessed something historical. The other highlight was introducing my children to the right to protest. Lydia asked many questions and I tried to answer them as honestly as possible. “Mommy is going to Madison because she’s upset that Scott Walker wants to take away things, like money, that our family needs. (I didn’t get into the whole union thing). I’m going to go to Madison and hope that he listens.”

My mom watched the girls on Friday night while I went down to the Capitol. After my experiences Friday night, I knew it would be very safe to bring them on Saturday. I got some supplies to make a sign and Lydia told me she wanted to make one too. She wanted her’s to say, “Scott Walker change your mind!” On the other side, we wrote “Princesses for teachers,” and made a similar sign for Audrey.

Lydia asked me if Scott Walker would steal from us when we went to the Capitol, and I told her he wouldn’t. She asked how many dollars he wanted to take, and I told her a lot. She excitedly asked me, “Mommy, what if Scott Walker listens to my sign and takes ZERO dollars?!?!?!,” and I told her that would be great. She asked me if Scott Walker was there too, and I told her he wasn’t. She asked why he wasn’t there, and I told her because most of the people there didn’t like him, and people don’t want to be around people who don’t like them. She said, “Not even Santa Claus likes Scott Walker.”

The girls stood with me for about two hours and held their signs high and proud. They complained a bit, and I told them they didn’t have to hold the signs, and they would go stomp away in the snow, and then come back to hold their signs more. Dozens of people took their pictures and cheered, “Hooray for princesses!” and they ate it up. As we left, Audrey insisted on walking, not riding in the stroller, and held her sign for everybody to see as she walked. It was a proud moment.

Coming Clean

When people find out that I wake up at 5:00 am every day to get to they gym before work, many are stunned and can't believe the willpower I have to get up at such an early hour and work out before I have to be to school. Well, it's time the truth comes out.

It's all for the shower.

Before I worked out in the morning, I would shower at night so I could sleep as late as possible. This started to become a pain because usually as soon as the girls are in bed, I start school work. If I have to interrupt that time with a shower, that means less time for work, and it also means that the shower tends to wake me up, which is not a good thing when I want to go to bed at a decent time.

So, I started showering in the morning. The bathroom is across the hall from Lydia and Audrey's room. Somehow, those two have super hearing powers and are able to hear the sound of me swallowing a vitamin or brushing mascara on my lashes. Inevitably, they wake up. That means I need to get them out of bed, keep them busy with a TV show and a bowl of dry cereal or a piece of fruit, and get ready while they keep barging into the bathroom to tell me that they want to watch a different show, need more Cheerios, dropped their banana, or want to wear deodorant too. It doesn't go well. Plus, I'm breaking two of Daddy's rules by letting them eat in the living room and watch TV before they're dressed. Additionally, once I'm ready to leave, I tell them to be quiet until Daddy wakes up. Pfffffffffftttttttttt!!!!!!! Yeah,right. Not only will they yell as soon as I'm out the door and wake up Daddy, but Charlie will also wake up, and then the whole family is up way too early.

It's even more terrible if they wake up BEFORE I actually get in the shower. I am treated to the blasts of cold air as they open the bathroom door and then push the shower curtain open and yell, "I see your boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" It's great. Nobody does that at the gym. Unless you're responding to Craigslist missed connections.

So, in order to get ready in peace and quiet, I go to the gym in the morning. If a byproduct of that is getting to run a few miles, lift a few weights, and do some sit-ups in the morning as well, so be it.

My Daughter, the Player

Lydia and I went to Michael's on Saturday to get supplies for making Valentines. We picked out all kinds of sparkles and stickers to glue to foam hearts. As we drove home, she first told me she's glad that nobody laughed at me in the store because I look like a person who is crazy. Thanks for the confidence boost, kid. Then, I told her that when we got home, I would go through her class list and on the back of each heart write who it was to and that is was from Lydia.

Lydia: There's one I don't want you to write who it's to or from on.
Me: Why?
Lydia: It's for somebody special.
Me: Who?
Lydia: I'm not telling you.
Me: Well, you have to tell me, because I need to know whose name NOT to put on, otherwise they will all have the names on them. (Score one for Mommy logic!)
Lydia: No, they're in the other class. (Boo... Mommy logic.)
Me: You sure you don't want to tell me who it is?
Lydia: You have to promise not to tell Daddy. (It's beginning already?)
Me: I promise. (LIES!)
Lydia: It's Henry.
Me: Oh, that's nice! What does Henry look like?
Lydia: I don't have to tell you. (Oh, it's begun.)
Me: Well, do you play with Henry when you get to play with Mr. K's class?
Lydia: Yes.
Me: Just you and Henry, or any other kids?
Lydia: Roman too. Can I make him a special Valentine also?

So, yes, Roman and Henry both got special Valentines from Lydia. Let the best man win.

Her First Piercing!

Audrey asked to get her ears pierced several months ago, and Jayson and I decided she could as a reward once she was potty-trained. Well, that time finally came this past week. Much like her older sister, she did it on her own terms and one day was just ready to be done with diapers and onto the Tinkerbell underwear with no looking back.

This did not sit well with Lydia. At first, we thought Lydia was jealous as she whispered into Audrey's ear, "Don't do it. It's going to hurt." Then after talking about it more with Lydia, we discovered she just didn't want anybody to hurt her little sister. Serious. Does it get better than that? The thing is, it would take a lot to hurt little Audrey. This is the same kid who went to get her flu mist and asked to have the flu shot instead, watched the needle go into her arm, and didn't even bat an eye. She was ready for pierced ears.

So, off to the mall we went this past Saturday. Audrey sat still as the lady put dots on her lobes, and as the two workers slipped the little piercing apparatus over the dots. (Meanwhile, Lydia was hiding and refused to look). 1-2-3! and it was done. She then screamed and cried for a few moments until we told her how beautiful they looked and she was done!

On the way out, Lydia stopped and looked at the display case and said, "Mommy, do you want me to show you my favorite?" as she pointed to a sparkly pink navel ring. Oof.

I expected that after just a few hours, the pain would go away and she would be fine, but she did complain about her ears hurting and asked a couple of times to take a nap without her earrings. I turn the earrings twice a day, and she still isn't too happy about that. However, I thought we were going to have some major issues when I got this IM from Jayson yesterday morning:

Audrey's earring fell out, now what? Fell out in her bed and after about 5-10 minutes I found both pieces.

I responded:

Can you try to put it back in? If it hurts, put ice on it, and then try to get it back in.

This was apparently confusing.

Put the earring on ice or her ear?


There was a little more back-and-forth, and my helpful suggestion:

Put ice on it, try to shove it back in. It might hurt. Tell her she can have ice cream for breakfast if she lets you do it.

We reached the decision to just numb her ear with ice and wait until Jayson's mom got to our house in thirty minutes to watch the girls while he had a meeting. Then, Jayson finally got it back in on his own! Score one for Daddy.

Now we just have to hope that Lydia's sparkly pink navel ring doesn't fall out because I have a feeling Jayson won't be shoving that back in and giving her ice cream.

Why a Blog?

Just an FYI as to why I decided to start a blog and why it will be mostly about my kids.

First of all, my kids are crazy. They say and do things that make me laugh really hard, all day long. I think maybe 1% of those things would make other people laugh as well, so I will share those with you.

Also, I'm a teacher, and my students have caught on to the fact that if they say, "Mrs. W., how are your kids?" or "Mrs. W., what did you kids do this weekend?" or "Mrs. W. your kids are the cutest ever," they can get me talking for several minutes on a subject completely unrelated to math. So, I need another outlet.

This blog will be mostly about my kids because that's mostly what my life is. When you have three little people who need adult supervision most of the time, there's really not much else going on. We do make sure we get times to ourselves, but you probably won't find our bowling night or the time we got to go grocery shopping without any kids to be as funny as our kids.

So, please enjoy. I would love to hear your comments. Tell me to get moving if I haven't posted in a while.

I've Got a Red Ticket!

I fixed our Wii yesterday, saving us the $85 we were ready to spend to send it in to Nintendo to have it repaired. It stopped working last week, which was a disappointment because the girls had just started playing it quite a bit. The top games have been:

1. A Disney princess game Lydia got for Christmas. Her favorite part is changing what her princess looks like, switching the eyes from blue to brown to purple(?), changing her dress, jewelry, hair color, etc. She then goes out into the actual part of the game where you’re supposed to do something, wave the Wii controller around and then complain that the magic isn’t working and asks me to do it for her.
2. Wii Sport Resort. Lydia really likes the biking part, especially making her biker go so fast that she turns blue and keels over. Both girls do well with a sword game where they cut things, which is a little worrisome.
3. Wii Just Dance Kids. This is hilarious to watch them play. Audrey hasn’t quite caught on to the fact that she has to hold the Wii remote when she plays, and after every song will yell, “I got none!” This game was supposed to be a Valentine’s Day gift, and I asked Jayson to get it a few weeks ago when it was on sale at Target. I came home from school to Lydia holding it up, saying, “Did you want to save this for something?”

So, this past week when the Wii stopped working, it was very sad. I decided to try a lens cleaning disk and liquid air before sending it in. The Wii would not read the lens cleaning disk, so I sprayed some liquid air in the slot, and put the lens cleaning disk in again. No luck. However, when the Wii spit it back out, there was a ticket on it! I would have thought my Wii was dispensing magical raffle tickets, if not for the fact that it was the same type of ticket Grandma Deb had brought the girls a couple weeks ago.

I believe that every time Grandma Deb visits, she plays a sick game of scouring the stores for the toy that has the most pieces, with bonus points for pieces small enough for Charlie to put in her mouth. Being that Charlie’s favorite items to put in her mouth are shoes and paper, Grandma Deb really hit the jackpot with the raffle tickets.

As soon as I pulled the ticket out, I called for Lydia to come into the room, and explained to her the reason the Wii was not working. I could see the wheels spinning in her head. Which sister would she blame? Would she throw in the added lie of, “I told her not to do it, but she did it anyway!”? Before she could speak, I raised a finger and said, “Do NOT lie to me.” She looked at the ground and admitted she had done it. We told her we were very angry she did it, but proud of her for telling the truth. She said, “I just didn’t know that you couldn’t put tickets in it.” I paused for a moment, wondering if it’s possible that in a 4 year-old’s mind it might actually be unclear that raffle tickets do not belong in electronic devices. Nah. She knew.